"Do not move or I will stab you with my very sharp spear!"
That pretty much sums up the Leach's party.
I jest of course, it wasn't a half-bad shindig. It wasn't the sort of party where I can say "Haha this happened" or "He ran around the room on his head shouting rawr rawr rawr rawr rawr, roar roar roar roar roar." In hindsight, I've never actually said the latter phrase ever, but I'm sure it would be hilarious if I ever had the opportunity to.
So, the day began with me waking up, me watching two episodes of Smallville because the season finale was coming up and I really wanted to know what happened because it was all getting very tense and exciting, and then I took the dog for a walk, at which point Hadley gave me a call to ask if I and Joe wanted to go to town to do a little bit of shopping. We agreed.
I picked up Hadley from her house with the dog so that she could see it and make the "aww!" sound a lot because Walter is quite possibly the cutest, most huggable-lovable dog in the entire world. When we got back to my home, I dried the dog and then we were off to Joe's house. Then we were off to Disneyland! I mean town. I have no idea why I said Disneyland.
It was pretty much the usual affair between us three. We laughed at each other's jokes and generally had a nice time. I also got my Dad's present, which was a bonus. He's such an easy man to buy for, and I don't know if I've said this before, but he literally said to me when we were in Sainsbury's, "That's what I want, a big torch," and so I got him a big torch. It has a krypton bulb, and so I finally have a way to defeat Superman.
Anyway, after a drink at Joe's we hitched a ride with his father to make our way to the Leach's. Naturally we had absolutely no idea where it is, so we asked Josh for directions. We thought Josh was proficient in the direction-giving area, but his crude instructions begged to differ. I say that based on a later event, but it matters not because we got there (kind of) and we only had to walk a hundred yards or so before we managed to find the home of the Leach twins.
When we got in we were led to the bar. They have a bar. I mean, actually, they have a bar. This was the Leach's equivalent of Sophia's huge juicy pork. It's not just like where they store drinks and stuff either, it's a fully functioning bar. With a stereo system.
Hold on.
...
...
My Dad just handed me £140. I'm now happy.
...
...
And we resume.
So yeah, they have a bar, and that's where we spent the first part of the evening. We broke out the deck of cards and played an intriguing game called Scabby Queen. Essentially if you have the queen or still have cards at the end of the game then the winner gets to smack you on the knuckles with the deck.
Anyway, that was that for a while and then a Hilton arrived with his Laura and then after that pizza arrived so we moved to the dining room to munch. That happened and then we moved into the lounge to watch "Do not move or I will stab you with my very sharp spear" also known as "Jedi". This was a hilarious film but it had a few disappointments. If you watched it, you'd instantly know what they are if you're a Family Guy fan. Oh, I'll tell you what I do recommend you watch on YouTube. It's called Here Comes Dr Tran, and it's hilarious. Some people manage to go on YouTube and find the funniest videos ever, which is not a knack I have. I go on YouTube and manage to find the worst videos ever. But I suppose that's just my luck.
Anyway, all in all it was actually quite a good night. In fact, it was another one of those nights that gave Joe and Josh to be gay all over me. I'm not quite sure why this happens, but apparently men will be gay for me for no apparent reason. I don't want gay all over me to be quite honest. I have nothing against gay people but I really don't appreciate men going gay all over me.
Anyway, next morning (the morning of today in fact) we made bacon and soon we were carted off in Joe's mum's car to pick up Becca. It was quite a nerve-racking ride for Joe's mum because she doesn't like the ice, but we made it, picked up Becca and got to Joe's house. At having to fight my usual battle of saying "Nope, stop at your house and I'll walk home" Joe decided that he and Becca would walk me home, which was fine. I then invited them in so they could see Walter and it was unanimously decided that he is the best dog in the world. Like, literally the best dog in the world. People normally don't like schnauzers very much, but Becca has now decided that Walter would be her ideal dog. He is the best dog in the world and it can't be denied. So uh... I win.
After I won, they went home and in exactly one hour and a bit because we'll most likely be late, we'll be at Edwards' party and the fourth instalment of our epic Christmas Adventure.
Until then. I don't have time to make it super awesome this time, but tomorrow I promise that I'll make an epic thing to go with it.
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