Salute to Stupidity: FOOTBALL STUFF

So this is a conversation that I had with Peter Duke discussing the new design for his football website. Soon later, the Chinese were mentioned. If you are offended by any of the following, I don't mean to offend, because I'm British and therefore so polite that my balls shrink. See? It works both ways. I'm not racist. But I also have the manhood of Chuck Norris so you can fuck off with that earlier comment. Either way, don't be offended, just laugh along because laughing is what keeps us all sane. Unless you laugh at morbid situations, then you're just a fucking nutjob.

Anyway, let's get on with this. Oh, and another warning, this was a Facebook conversation, so the usual warnings about disjointed sentences and stuff applies.

Peter Duke: "Well I'm kind of hoping the Olympics could be the first thing we cover."
Me: "Maybe"
Dukey: "Not sure about it though, you'd need to be writing a preview/report almost daily."
Me: "There's more than one game? Ooh, new idea. How about, now this is a great idea, just hear me out"
Dukey: "In the Olympics? There's a whole group stage xD"
Me: "They take every football team to the Nevada desert. Right, and they set up one goal. And it's a massive knock-out tournament. And it'll take DAYS. But people would watch it."
Dukey: "They would, without a doubt."
Me: "Hell, I would watch that."
Dukey: "Right I'm installing myself as editor for this site."
Me: "Upwards of a thousand people trying to get at a ball. Priceless."
Dukey: "It would be. And you can go on YouTube and see 98 little kids playing 11 men. It's hilarious."
Me: "I'm going to find an American oil tycoon and pitch this to him."
Dukey: "There's like, no room on the pitch."
Me: "Oh?"
Dukey: "Yeeeaaaah, type Real Madrid China kids."
Me: "I assume this was some kind of charity event?"
Dukey: "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=udx2K73DmMo PR I think." (Watch the video to understand the rest of the joke)
Me: "This camera work is terrible."
Dukey: "They're Chinese..."
Me: "WHAT THE FUCK. Is this what Europe is going to look like soon? Badum ts"
Dukey: ":P"
Me: "There's not even bothering about formation. They're just swarming. And I love how there's just one fat kid."
Dukey: "Me too xD!"
Me: "God this is crazy. Maybe this'll teach the Chinese that just pouring in numbers doesn't actually give you a tactical advantage. OH NO! THEY'RE LEARNING!"
Dukey: "xD!!!! It's horrifyingly adorable!"
Me: "Yeh... Do you think this is what all Storm Troopers are like when they're kids?"
Dukey: "That's the funniest thing I've read all day."
Me: "I'm glad."

I hope you found that as laugh-worthy as Dukey and I did. Otherwise, I guess you had to be there.

Pete out.

Electric Teapots: STEREOTYPES WEEK

So this week has been a bit controversial and some people got really angsty because Kesh mentioned the words "potato" and "famine" in a sentence. I did as well and I was told off by the Ire I was talking to.

Huh, I thought I invented the word Ire, but apparently it's real. Just so you know, an Ire (as I invented it) is an Irish person. British people are called Brits and American people are called Americans, Canadians, Germans etc., so I figured Ireland needed one as well. Ire. It just works. Ohhh, of course, it means "anger or intense fury" but can also be used as an abbreviation of Ireland. Well, Ires are now going to be the people of Ireland. It makes perfect sense.

Anyway, I'm probably done. Kesh's video was hilarious, James' video felt a bit rushed and my video was pretty cool.

I'm off to Ireland next week, so no posts, but when I get back there will be a bucket load of stuff. I want to leave it with some good content-to-go though, so I might see if I can set some time aside just to blog stuff. I really want to make some short stories.

Anyway, I'm done.

Pete out.

I EXPECT YOU

Yeah... I should probably do some kind of actual blog post soon... but I truly am pulling up blanks at the moment while I work on my video projects. I will try and do that comic I talked about, but I have yet to think of any story lines. I'll try and do some short stories.

You could call this a dry spell at the moment, but trust me, soon I will be back to blogging form and it'll be awesome and cool.

Pete out.

I WON AN AWARD

This video basically describes what I talked about in my previous blog post, along with some awesome footage of my dog being a dog and some links to some cool videos.

Pete out.

Here Comes the Summer

So on Sunday night I left DMU for the last time for the summer. For one, I'm really glad that I don't have to cook for myself for the next four months, because I was getting sick of my cooking. There's only so many different ways you can cook pasta bake. Two. It's either tuna pasta bake or pork pasta bake. Although on Sunday I did have to get rid of all my food, so I simply put all of it in the wok and then I made the cheesiest, meatiest pasta bake that you even did taste. And it was just too much to handle. I put far too much cheese in. It was verging on being a French-level of cheese. And that is a horrendous amount of cheese.

But what makes this occasion so momentous? I mean, half my friends had already left, and then I accidentally became super duper friends with everyone from the radio. Although I was drunk at the time, so that's understandable.

Well to be perfectly honest with you, this last week at DMU has been an amazingly busy week. It started with filming, and then there was more filming, and more filming, and then editing, and then more editing, and then fuck loads more editing, and then there were the Demon Media Awards. That was a fun night.

Everyone donned their finest evening-wear and headed over to the Phoenix cinema where we were given tokens for TWO FREE DRINKS!Wooow! Free alcohol is a very rare commodity, and to get it on the last night out of the year was just fabulous. Either way, this great evening started out with this:



And I helped make it! Yeah I know, I'm super cool, aren't I? A first year and involved in every major filming opportunity for Demon TV and the DSU. I think I may be the youngest in history to do so... Or at least the best.

The best.

Speaking of being the best, you'll never guess what I won.

Damn straight! I made a speech and everything. Called Ryan my rock and thanked him. Got a drink out of it. That's multiple successes there.

But that's not even the end of it. Not only did I win Best Off-Screen Male, but you see all of these other award winners?

Aside from the female categories, I was nominated in all of them. That's four categories in total. That's mental. Best On-Screen (despite only being on-screen once in Fresher's Week, until of course the eventual release of Here's a Thing), Best Off-Screen (which I won), Best Newcomer and Best Show. To be fair though, there was literally no way that I wouldn't win Best Show (I was the co-director for the winner) because I've directed, co-directed, managed, and filmed almost every single show this year. I'm pretty mental.

Christ, I had a lie-in this morning. God, that was nice. I guess I shouldn't complain really, I used to get up at 7 every morning to go to school. Crazy times. Well, to be honest, I'm getting the same amount of sleep, but just shifted a few hours one way.

Oh well. After the awards we went to the SU to drink more and have a good time, and good times were had by all. It was great fun.

Anyway, that's the story of the Demon Media Awards.

So over the course of the weekend I've been giving hearty goodbyes to my Demon folks, and there are even a few of them whom I'll miss. Now that's a nod in their direction, because as my home folks will know, it takes a lot for people to "matter" to me. That's the wrong word, but I can't think of any other right now that mean what I want to mean. I'm sure you know what I mean.

In some ways I'll miss Leicester though. I kind of liked the lifestyle I was living, even though I now hate my cooking and I've always disliked Leicester. But I like DMU. I like having access to super computers to do my work, and the SU to hang out in and party in, and the Polar Bear to drink in. It's been a super cool year. Now, combine that with all of my friends together and that'd basically be my life complete.

Oh, that'd be the dream.

Pete out.

Electric Teapots: Changes

I decided to put a video together that I've been wanting to do for a while now, and that is a four-way conversation in one video, with each of the Teapots members being somewhere completely different. If it weren't for Langley's bad acting, this video would've been the coolest thing since my last video.

Pete out.

I DRAW LYN'S FACE

I tried something new this week with screencapping. This is in response to a vlog a while back when Lyn painted my face, and recently she Tweeted saying, "I suck at drawing" and I was all like, "Oh you so did not just Tweet that" so I made this video to prove to her that this drawing lark isn't for everyone, and she's certainly got quite a talent for it.

I, however, do not.

I also did a rubbish weekly update this week:



It's rubbish because I put literally no effort into it. And as such, I'm thinking that I need to, in future videos, do tiny sketches (maybe 10, 20 seconds long) just to make the video a little bit more fun, because this video really was very forced.

But hey, I don't know, what do you think? I like the way I've built up these updates into something a bit more than talking about the week. For example, including links to the videos I've done with a short opinion about them. I like that. Next week is going to be insane for those.

I'm also sorry for not blogging as much as I could do. I know it's taken a bit of a backseat to the videos, but that's because videos are literally my life right now. Tomorrow night is the Demon Media Awards, and that marks the end of my long stint of video making. And then I'll only have my channel, Electric Teapots and Granite Moths to worry about. As opposed to my channel, ETeapots, Granite Moths, Demon TV, a music video, another music video, David Winter's sketches, and videos for the students' union. Oh, and that's what I've been doing since I finished my coursework. This is one of those times where a day off is required. That won't happen for a while though, because this weekend I've got the radio to worry about! Yay!

Media powers, activate!

Ohhhhh. You know that Cliché Life Man fan art that RyanFapfap made for me? I think I should start making comics out of it. It sounds like a cool idea, right? YEAH.

Pete out.