The Great Wasp Saga

So there was a HUGGEGEE wasp in my room. Like MASSIVE. So big that the word "huge" needed two extra Gs and a further two extra Es. It was like the size of my thumb. How it got in here is completely beyond my comprehension. My window wasn't open at all in the night, and in fact wasn't open yesterday. So that means that this bastard wasp has just been hanging out in my room for like two days. What was it doing? Just chilling out on the window sill? Probably.

What's the point in this story, you ask? Well, I had to tell the story of the most traumatic experience I've ever had with a wasp.

Like I say, this huge wasp was just chilling out in my room. It was on the curtain when I discovered it just before I was going to make some breakfast. I could see it walking downwards towards the ground, and it disappeared. I wondered where it had gone, and it started climbing up the back of my of my computer. It then just started chilling out on the back of my PC, near one of the cooling fans. I was gravely concerned at this point. If it were able to get into my room without my noticing, perhaps it could also sneak into my PC, at which point it would certainly die. I could not let this happen. I bravely found a tupperware box and tried to sneak the wasp inside. When I thought I had it, I placed the lid on, happy with my efforts.

The following events may shock and disturb.

I could hear the wasp struggling. It was all like, "BUZZZZZZ" and I was concerned. I looked at my new pal, only to discover that he'd tried to escape from the box, and was subsequently caught in the lid. I was mortified. I couldn't bear it. It was obviously in so much not-pain, since bugs don't really feel pain (at least not on the level we do). It was wriggling, and I was so scared that I was killing the poor thing. In an instant I dropped the box and opened the window. Thankfully the wasp flew out the window, looking back as if to thank me. We shared a brief moment of sorrow, and then he went on his way.

I don't think I made a new friend today. Gosh it was horrible. Now I know to simply invite the wasp out into the open where it can frolic, instead of imposing my harsh tyrannical justice upon it.

Woe is I. Hopefully you've learned something from this too. Make friends with wasps, don't fear them, and don't let them fear you.

Pete out.